Southern Life

SOUTHERN LIFE

I know there have been many writings about life in the South. The land of my nativity. Maybe not one like this one, though. Rank this one with the kindly perturbed and mildly defensive.

Would you go to China...or the South Sea Islands...or Egypt...or Paris...or...(well, you get the point) and insist that they serve bagels and lox...or bean burritos...or grits? Would you go to Mexico and pout when they wouldn’t serve you poi? I, for one, would not show up in Boston and demand they make room on their menus alongside clam chowder and baked beans for real Southern Brunswick stew and pork barbecue.

And I certainly wouldn’t move to The Bronx and even SUGGEST that they tone down their accent. Heck, it’s one good reason to visit New York! Each part of this wonderful country of ours sports a way of speech that is unlike any other..the South included. (I’ve had my share of requests to “say something” when traveling out of my region just so that the Southernly challenged can hear my twang...and believe me, it’s a doozy! And I wouldn’t trade it for all the voice coaching in Hollywood!)

Which brings me to another mild beef...why does Hollywood seem to, in large part, place people in obviously Southern-bent roles who aren’t even remotely Southern, and then ask them to speak as if they were? I know quite a few Southern actors who would jump at those parts if only given the chance! And speak quite naturally. No training. No coaching. Then on the other hand you have folks that are definitely Southern who are, fortunately, placed in those parts and even in parts that don’t necessarily call for a Southerner. Strange.

I think that TV and movies have affected the children and teens of the South so much that many of them think they have to change their accent in order to be respected. Pshaw! I want to approach some of them and say, “Sugah, I know your parents and your grandparents, and you don’t talk like them! You get your Southern britches back on and speak like you was raised!”

Now you may think, “Surely she doesn’t talk like that!” Well, of course I do! It’s just plain fun! That’s not to say that I don’t know proper English. It was one of my best classes in school and one that I made some of my best grades in. ‘Cept my freshman year of high school, but let’s not go there. Bad year. It fouled up a lot of my life. Moving on...

Okay, so let’s wrap this up. What I’d really like to say is this: If you want to move down here and live with us, come on, honey! The more the merrier! Test my Southern hospitality! But don’t come here asking that I take up your ways! Incorporate your foods into my menu! Start talking your way! Adapt! I’d have to if I moved to your area! Would you start serving sweet tea just for me? Would you change your accent just to accommodate me? Would you who may not have a hospitable bone in your body all of a sudden become the quintessential host/hostess just for me? Bet not. And I wouldn’t ask you to.

Oh, and should you find yourself thinking that I’m on a high horse let me just tell you this:

I have visited New York City, and I love it. The people, the crowds, the food, the subway (yes, the subway, except after a Yankees game! Yikes! Never again!)

I have visited San Francisco, and I love it. Fisherman’s Wharf, the food, the sourdough bread, the trolleys on the hilly streets, Chinatown.

I have visited Los Angeles, and I love it. The Walk of Fame, Grauman’s Chinese Theatre and the footprints and handprints, the food, the weather, the landscape, the sights.

I have visited Las Vegas, and I love it. The beautiful brightly colored lights, the (cheap) food, the fountains, the shows, the desert.

I have visited Arizona, and I love it. The desert, Hoover Dam, the Colorado River, the Grand Canyon.

And I’ve been to lots more of this country, and there’s very little I didn’t love about it; but it’s always good to come back to The Deep South. The land I love. The land I want to keep pure. Well, it’s a little late for that, but I hope you’ll help me preserve what’s left of my corner of the country. It’s the only one like it. Thanks for listening. Y’all have a nice day, ya heah?